All About ME!!

   I hope you've been digging the characters so far, but there's been a concern that things have been getting a little too exciting and interesting. To remedy that situation, I am now going to take the time to introduce myself. So begins the tale of Joey Abisso.

This is why I don't eat vegetables. We're kindred spirits.

  I was born in 1987 and raised in the bustling town of Andover, Massachusetts. It wasn't quite bustling enough, though, because immediately after high school, I moved to New York City. I did the whole college thing at NYU, where my skills as a filmmaker were nurtured, developed, and occasionally lauded. (My skills as a human pea-pod were not so well-received, but my heart wasn't in it by that point anyway.) It was during this time that "Axes of Evil" was developed with some good buddies, but this update is about me, not (gag!) others.

   Since then, I've been able to procure a few odd jobs with comparably odd people; screenwriting, animating, and lots and lots of babysitting. Having reaffirmed my belief that artists are bonkers, I figured it was time to commit myself to the flock and really dive into a project of my own, which leads us to now.

Forever a tourist.

   On "Axes of Evil," my current roles include head writer, designer, and animator. I am not alone in this, though, and some other members of the team will likely be introducing themselves shortly. So, um, yes...To conclude, I am an overall delightful fellow who enjoys movies, novels, writing, laughter, kittens, laughing kittens, beef, poultry, doodling, and brief walks on the beach. Thanks for indulging me.

Ta-ta! I'm off to Grey Gardens.

Character Introduction #2: King Solomon

Here he is! The leader of our time-hopping heroes:

King Solomon

Age: 67

Plucked From: Jerusalem, Israel, 936 BC

   Yes, we're dealing with the same King Solomon of Old Testament fame, best known for suggesting a baby be chopped in half in order to trick a hooker. It is this demonstration of wisdom that convinces God Himself to bestow upon Solomon the responsibility of saving the universe as we know it, locating and leading the other wielders of the Axes of Power, (the aforementioned "good axes"), and defeating the wielders of the Axes of Evil, (which are the...evil...yeah, you get it, it's the title of the show).

   Now, because our plan is to take a pretty detailed look at the production process, some inevitable plot details will be revealed, such as the entire preceding paragraph. That's fine; it's the premise. Nonetheless, we will TRY to minimize any spoilers that would negate one's theoretical/eventual enjoyment of the content we are trying to create.

   That being said, though Solomon might come across as a crotchety old man, his reputation as one of history's wisest men is well-earned. There's a lot more to him than he lets on. Oooh, mysterious, right? We hope so. And for even more information, you can go read your Bibles!

  Coming up: more characters and wholesome messages.

Character Introduction #1: The Slumberjack

   Plucked from various times and places in order to fulfill their collective destiny, our heroes are ready for their introduction! Actually, just one is. We have to space these updates out. Since you've already gotten a taste of King Solomon, let's start with someone a little bit less familiar.

The Slumberjack (Louis LeBlanc)

Age: 36

Plucked From: Ontario, Canada, 2079 AD

   Before becoming a superhero, Louis was a mere lumberjack-turned-environmentalist, protesting against the mistreatment of his arboreal neighbors. Without giving too much away, that career went south, and Louis found himself living in a Canada far removed from the idyllic, syrup-guzzling nation we know today.

   One night soon thereafter, Louis was blessed with the power to induce narcoleptic tendencies in his foes, a power he received in a dream. Thus, the newly-christened Slumberjack became a beacon of hope; a Canadian beacon, if you will. Alongside his sidekick/mascot, the Slumberjackrabbit, Louis has had enough adventures to provide fodder for his own spin-off series, but we're getting waaaaay ahead of ourselves. What's important to note, though, is that there was no shortage of activity for the Slumberjack, and he developed an unfortunate addiction to crystal meth in a foolhardy attempt to stay wired and fight crime 24/7.

   Once he joins Solomon's team, he provides a near-endless source of joviality and brute strength, but traveling through time causes him to crash hard. He's a lovable guy, but his methamphetamine-fueled buffoonery only serves our show's ultimate message: DRUGS ARE BAD, KIDS!

  Alright, that's a fair enough little biography. Stay tuned for more real soon.

Chop the Umbilical Cord - A Blog is Born

   Yes, it's true. Another bloody, screaming word-filled entity has been birthed into the online abyss. Before we extend the metaphor to a disgusting breaking point, (most likely involving robot placenta), let us simply welcome you to this happy, fun, and most importantly, SAFE place.

   From here on out, this blog will focus on the production of the fledgling animated action-comedy series, "Axes of Evil." If that goes south, we will default to pictures and videos of adorable animals, but in the meantime, "Axes of Evil" chronicles the adventures of a time-traveling team of heroes as they attempt to prevent Satan from messing up the future!...And before you ask, yes there are axes involved. Evil axes! (Also good axes.)

   This simple idea has been gestating for a couple of years, spawning a few scripts, character designs, and a T-shirt, but we recently decided to throw caution to the wind and get this party started. Making an animated pilot, (and God willing, subsequent series), will be quite an undertaking, so we thought we'd share the process with you, inch-by-delightfully-painful-inch.

   More to come very soon, including a proper introduction to the team, (both the characters and their creators), as well as many theoretically fun behind-the-scenes goodies.

   Until then, much love, and stay sane.